RSS

Tag Archives: marriage

Let’s Go Red, Point Blank with Asian Weekly 25th November, 2016

Let’s Go Red

hiv-aids

This World Aids Day the theme is “HIVNOTRETRO” so let’s revisit this viral disease that has consumed the lives of millions.

Some facts from the World Health Organization:

Infection results in the progressive deterioration of the immune system, breaking down the body’s ability to fend off some infections and other diseases. AIDS (Acquired immune deficiency syndrome) refers to the most advanced stages of HIV infection, defined by the occurrence of any of more than 20 opportunistic infections or related cancers.

HIV can be transmitted through:

Unprotected sexual intercourse (vaginal or anal) or oral sex with an infected person;

Transfusions of contaminated blood;

The sharing of contaminated needles, syringes or other sharp instruments;

The transmission between a mother and her baby during pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding.

Globally, an estimated 36.7 million (34.0–39.8 million) people were living with HIV in 2015, and 1.8 million (1.5–2.0 million) of these were children.

From the UNAIDS most recent report of 2016:

The latest UNAIDS data, covering 160 countries, demonstrate both the enormous

gains already made and what can be achieved in the coming years through a

Fast-Track approach. In just the last two years the number of people living with

HIV on antiretroviral therapy has increased by about a third, reaching 17.0 million people—2 million more than the 15 million by 2015 target set by the United Nations General Assembly in 2011. Since the first global treatment target was set in 2003, annual AIDS-related deaths have decreased by 43%. In the world’s most affected region, eastern and southern Africa, the number of people on treatment has more than doubled since 2010, reaching nearly 10.3 million people. AIDS related deaths in the region have decreased by 36% since 2010.

Let’s come closer to home, and these are the facts:

The theme here is “Getting to Zero HIV Infections- Engage Prevent Celebrate #JijueJipange”

Kenya has the joint fourth-largest HIV epidemic in the world (alongside Mozambique and Uganda), in terms of the number of people living with HIV, which was 1.6 million people in 2013. Roughly 58,000 people died from AIDS-related illnesses in the same year although this dropped by 32% between 2009 and 2013.1 There are now 1.1 million children orphaned by AIDS.

The first case of HIV in Kenya was detected in 1984, and by the mid-1990s it was one of the major causes of mortality in the country putting huge demands on the healthcare system as well as the economy. HIV prevalence peaked at 10.5% in 1996, and had fallen to 6% by 2013 mainly due to the rapid scaling up of antiretroviral treatment (ART).

Let’s talk about AIDS.

In Kenya unfortunately the highest prevalence is between married couples. How come? If we take a typical married couple then here are some harsh facts:

  • Most have a child out of wedlock
  • A traditional wedding expenses prevents a proper union
  • Modern wedding phenomenon also does not help
  • Multiple partners are part of this “marriage”

The above are just some obvious signs of broken relationships and worse health statuses. At the core religion plays a crucial role it is up to the Papacy to say whether condoms are allowed or not. In the recent Zika virus crisis Pope Francis said that the use of condoms was ok, while the Church is known to be one of the largest caregivers to HIV patients, it mostly rebuffs comments on using condoms to prevent HIV.

Thus, as Kenyans it comes down to the culture. We have to come out of our shells and discuss serious topics and take responsibility. Going into a marriage when you do not know your HIV status is like signing up for a death sentence for life. This goes for all communities and should be seen as taking personal health seriously. There is nothing wrong in looking up your spouse’s health status, just like when the woman is ready to conceive and the gynecologist asks about the family medical history, so why not about sexual diseases? It is your right as both man and woman to know. There are no hidden facts that quite a few marriages are already having affairs so why would you want to poison your family with a disease you are bringing home because you cannot control your desires. Marriage is a partnership for better or for worse, but does not let that worse be the end of a life.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on November 25, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Till Bank Money Runs Out with Asian Weekly 29th July, 16

Till Bank Money Runs Out

Money-Marriage

Money is very important and if anybody told you otherwise you need to look at him or her with shock. Money buys you materialistic joys or pains, and yes in increasing cases nowadays husbands and wives. The difference is in the type of person you and what is your attitude in life. You might be the adventurous, living out of whatever you have and experiencing life in a trance. You might be the hardworking, completely desk job worker and just making ends meet. You might be the courageous, entrepreneur, dreamer, risk taker and doer. You might be narcissist and here there are two categories- loves he/she and money, loves he/she but no money. But see money features in this situation somehow or the other. If you are living with your parents and they are paying the bills, get out otherwise you will never grow up and respect them. If you are not living with your parents and you are paying their bills, then you are a rare species. If you are not living with your parents and not paying their bills, then your wife is ruling your bank account.

Women have more ambition than ever before; they are creating more opportunities in their studies, education achievements and subsequently in the corporate world. More women are dabbling with a small business, unfortunately because they have no choice since the husband has lost the job and is too stubborn to change. But luckily there are more women who want to create jobs, want to run businesses, want to change the world. The price they are paying or the opportunity cost is marriage and children.

Let’s talk about marriage then. People get married because they love each other. People get married because they see a caregiver, baby bearer and provider. People get married because they want a companion or business partner. There are few unique reasons why people get married, but there are a billion reasons why you get married or not, or have children or not. These could be lack of partners, finances or sickness. Girls are growing up with knowledge that they too can earn, provide for themselves and enjoy their income. Thus, when they will meet a man who can’t fulfill their materialistic needs, they will turn away. Very few women will look at the personality traits and marry a man who earns less than them. You might say that the woman is being choosy. Being a feminist, I would say she shouldn’t settle for anybody less. But less can mean, he may not have the money or education status, but he makes you smile, respects you and your family and is willing to keep you happy. Don’t get me wrong I am not talking about a dog, because there are some highly educated women or high earning women who think they need to marry only a President, sorry ladies you are not the First Ladies either.

The main thing is always remember to be you. Don’t put up with excuses or pressures. Technically you should get married by the age of 25 or 27 and have your children by the age of 30 or 32, this is for you ladies because the number of diseases or health complications in our age group is rising. However if you have not found the right partner for whatever personal reason, remember this that while society will look at you for being a frustrated, fussy, feminist, you know what you want and you go for it. This can be anything from owning a business, running a mega corporation, building a school, adopting a child or marrying the person who loves and accepts for who you are and not for what you are expected to be for others.

It is the society’s responsibility to encourage their children, both girls and boys that they must respect each other, they are here to take humanity forward with their values, whether it is religious, cultural or economical. They have a role to play and they are free to carve their own path as long as they are not hurting or disrespecting people. If women don’t want to get married because the men can’t earn or provide enough then that’s acceptable. Yes it is a cliché line but absolutely true, it is better than being in a bad marriage or divorced with children and you are struggling to make ends meet. Because when a marriage breaks, the first blame is on the woman and while there might be some unreasonable woman who does contribute to the breakup, the point is that we must assess the situation with complete honesty, accept the responsibilities and eventually forgive to move on.

 

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on August 9, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , ,