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Till Bank Money Runs Out with Asian Weekly 29th July, 16

09 Aug

Till Bank Money Runs Out

Money-Marriage

Money is very important and if anybody told you otherwise you need to look at him or her with shock. Money buys you materialistic joys or pains, and yes in increasing cases nowadays husbands and wives. The difference is in the type of person you and what is your attitude in life. You might be the adventurous, living out of whatever you have and experiencing life in a trance. You might be the hardworking, completely desk job worker and just making ends meet. You might be the courageous, entrepreneur, dreamer, risk taker and doer. You might be narcissist and here there are two categories- loves he/she and money, loves he/she but no money. But see money features in this situation somehow or the other. If you are living with your parents and they are paying the bills, get out otherwise you will never grow up and respect them. If you are not living with your parents and you are paying their bills, then you are a rare species. If you are not living with your parents and not paying their bills, then your wife is ruling your bank account.

Women have more ambition than ever before; they are creating more opportunities in their studies, education achievements and subsequently in the corporate world. More women are dabbling with a small business, unfortunately because they have no choice since the husband has lost the job and is too stubborn to change. But luckily there are more women who want to create jobs, want to run businesses, want to change the world. The price they are paying or the opportunity cost is marriage and children.

Let’s talk about marriage then. People get married because they love each other. People get married because they see a caregiver, baby bearer and provider. People get married because they want a companion or business partner. There are few unique reasons why people get married, but there are a billion reasons why you get married or not, or have children or not. These could be lack of partners, finances or sickness. Girls are growing up with knowledge that they too can earn, provide for themselves and enjoy their income. Thus, when they will meet a man who can’t fulfill their materialistic needs, they will turn away. Very few women will look at the personality traits and marry a man who earns less than them. You might say that the woman is being choosy. Being a feminist, I would say she shouldn’t settle for anybody less. But less can mean, he may not have the money or education status, but he makes you smile, respects you and your family and is willing to keep you happy. Don’t get me wrong I am not talking about a dog, because there are some highly educated women or high earning women who think they need to marry only a President, sorry ladies you are not the First Ladies either.

The main thing is always remember to be you. Don’t put up with excuses or pressures. Technically you should get married by the age of 25 or 27 and have your children by the age of 30 or 32, this is for you ladies because the number of diseases or health complications in our age group is rising. However if you have not found the right partner for whatever personal reason, remember this that while society will look at you for being a frustrated, fussy, feminist, you know what you want and you go for it. This can be anything from owning a business, running a mega corporation, building a school, adopting a child or marrying the person who loves and accepts for who you are and not for what you are expected to be for others.

It is the society’s responsibility to encourage their children, both girls and boys that they must respect each other, they are here to take humanity forward with their values, whether it is religious, cultural or economical. They have a role to play and they are free to carve their own path as long as they are not hurting or disrespecting people. If women don’t want to get married because the men can’t earn or provide enough then that’s acceptable. Yes it is a cliché line but absolutely true, it is better than being in a bad marriage or divorced with children and you are struggling to make ends meet. Because when a marriage breaks, the first blame is on the woman and while there might be some unreasonable woman who does contribute to the breakup, the point is that we must assess the situation with complete honesty, accept the responsibilities and eventually forgive to move on.

 

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Posted by on August 9, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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