Good Housekeeping & Bad Manners
A home is a beautiful sanctuary especially for those who live in it. However the dynamics of how the house should operate is changing in today’s times. You have those who own the house and have their children with them, and so far the consensus is to let things be. Then you have those who don’t own the house, but want to impose their ideas on to the house; there is almost no democracy. Finally you have those who own the house, live alone and well almost everything is done their way, but obviously.
Recently though, with the exposure to knowledge and over thinking and sharing on social media, the hype around Feng Shui, what color paint suits your room etc is taking over and creating unnecessary friction. In the olden days, a house provided shelter, which meant place to sleep, meet and eat. The man earned and the woman cooked and cleaned. Therefore whatever the culture you were in, traditions were maintained from prayers, cooking to basic manners. Come to this 21st century and people have moved from continents, countries and cities and different cultures be settled in diverse populations. It has come down to, whichever country you are living in, that culture is taking over, for example a simple trip to the temple or the supermarket is completely different. No doubt modern parents are preferring to adapt to the country they are born and brought up or have moved into, the older generation is holding on to their thoughts. But are these thoughts worth it?
The one on debate here is the taking off shoes before entering a house. I can’t put my finger on which culture, religion or tradition dictates this idea, but let’s talk common sense. If you suffer from OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) you are most likely to keep your shoes at the door and for the guests too. You will faint at the idea of unwanted dirt, germs or shoes poking at your floors. If that is your game, then make the necessary provision so that when someone comes home, and while they may not be comfortable walking bare feet or exposing their socks, you may want to give them courtesy slippers. You may even want to brand them, if you have the money. When we were young and carpets were hard to come by, I remember if you didn’t remove your shoes while stepping into the sitting room, you were stared at with disgust. Thankfully that has stopped.
If you are the sole owner of your house and the only occupant then by all means live it out however you want. If you are sharing then either you instill these principles and probably be open to change. Because so much around us is changing, for example breast-feeding babies, in some homes, some mothers remain in the same room with the other ladies and carry on, so while it remains an individual choice it becomes tricky when you share a house. I’ll take an example from the famous TV Series Downtown Abbey, countries who have been colonized by the British still carry on or expect to have British traditions, for example tea times, carrying trays and so on. Thus, carrying on long time traditions or setting standards in the house are old-fashioned ideas. If you have been Americanized or become a global citizen, you may be more relaxed to several traditions or even over do them, because you have become oversenstizied to feelings, vibrations and energies theories.
When it comes to the Indian homes, things are slightly rigid or completely liberal, it is very difficult to tell because usually it is not about leaving the shoes outside the home, it might be a case of that person is just not welcome for whatever reason.
harleen jabbal 